In Quest For Love

Beverly Lanzetta Meditations, Study

Beyond personality as we know it, and the distractions we pursue every day, is a luminous force of intimacy, a gentleness and compassion so profound and comprehensive that to experience it but once changes our lives. We have been given an immense gift: the capacity to open our hearts to the mystery of the mothering spirit of life.

My path began in a search for this force of intimacy. What I wanted to know is whether there is a love that transcends the personal and romantic. Is there a love greater than our individual need or desire, a love more steady than the fluctuations of emotion that pass for love? I threw my whole being onto the quest. For many of my early years, it occupied my heart and mind at a depth and intensity I didn’t know was in me. Some say that this longing is God’s longing in us. All I know is that my intense desire broke open my need to exist, that is, my limited and false self. In the process, I came to feel Love, and to experience the inner life of the divine as absolute sweetness, nonviolence, and mercy. And thus I glimpsed my own life, of a journey toward the source of these holy energies. For beyond any duality—there is no opposite or counterbalance to absolute love—I found the One in its magnitude and essence.

Many before me also have felt the inextricable bond of spirit-matter, and yearned for a spirituality of the whole cosmos, a global spirituality. Something—a vantage point, a knowing—was sought; a mystical awareness that all matter, all living forms, and the entire orb of existence are connected by energetic bonds of affinity. The Spirit imbues all life and until we come to an all-life, all-body understanding of Spirit, we will not know our true selves or our place in the universe. Spirituality is not tribal or selective, not confined to members of a privileged group, but the discovery of a reality, a principle, that governs the whole of life, like the action of atoms and molecules, or the equation of water. It is global because it is intrinsic to everything; it is not partial, selective or fragmentary but a vision of creation as an organic whole.

What I came to understand is this: only when we experience and understand how Total love is will we walk the path of the mothering spirit of life.